When It Comes To Love {Part Two}

Cloaked under the safety of night, I made my way to the dive diner downtown. I was there to meet with the three women from When It Comes To Love. They had agreed to be interviewed but only in secret. 

Okay, not really. I emailed them. Because I’m resourceful like that.

When I found out about the quest, there were tons of questions burning in my head. So I asked them. And now, dear reader, you are getting some of the answers.  I wish I could have sat down for a video interview with them but alas, that just wouldn’t do.

How did you and your two co-conspirators come up with this idea?

Tulah: Basically, I was just trying to be open with the desire to get married and they came up with everything else because they are fun geniuses!

Heartbreaker: I was the last one in on this operation. I liked what the other women were thinking and threw some more ideas out there. We all agreed and here we are.

Meg: It was all Tulah. I think it had something to do with her approaching her 30th birthday.

Why the secrecy?

Meg: It’s not a secret in my circles of friends. I’m freely telling friends and family about it. Online, though, you gotta be secret to add a little intrigue. When I direct friends and family to the blog, I tell them I’m Meg.

Tulah: While being open with friends is a big part of this for me (being real about wanting to get married), it doesn’t mean being “real” with the entire world… Being open is meant to be with a select trustworthy group of friends. So I think the “secrecy” is more a healthy caution since the blog is open to the world… and therefore online I’ll remain Tulah.

Heartbreaker: The purpose of the blog is to share our joys, our tears, our lessons and how the Lord stretches and grows us in the process. It’s something that everyone can (hopefully) glean from as well as just enjoy how the story unfolds! There’s a degree of risk for all the women involved. We are basically exposing our hearts and souls to what we long for and desire in a man and marriage for the world to see. The world is filled with mixed-messages about marriage, dating, relationships, men, women. Hopefully, through our real life stories of love lined-up with what the Scripture says, we can not only share what it could look like to have a godly relationship (and hopefully marriage) but we can live it out for everyone to see…in a way, it’s not so much about us as it is the process of what we’ve learned and how God has grown us.

Are you shy around men?  

Heartbreaker: Haha. Nope. Not at all. Perhaps that’s my problem. I’m not forward with them, but I’m certainly not timid around them. I often approach any and everyone. Until I start crushing on someone…you can easily determine if I like someone because I can’t seem to talk to them. It takes extremely concentrated effort to keep my brain moving forward with the conversation and not to bumble around clumsily.

Meg: Yes. Unless they are married or in a commited relationship. Then I seem to relax and be myself around them. Twisted, I know.

Tulah: Only the ones that are single. The rest of the guys are easy to talk to because I don’t have to wonder if they’re wondering anything… the pressure disappears and voila! I can be myself.

What has been the most influential book in your life (besides the Bible) in regards to relationships? 

Tulah: Beauty by the Book (can’t remember the author): While not entirely just about relationships- it touches on them and how we should seek to be who God created us to be individually and in that relationship.

Meg: “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus.” Or was it, “Mars and Venus on a Date”? Maybe it’s both of these. They helped me see how totally fundementally different men and women are.

Heartbreaker: You know, I really don’t read that many relationship books. I tend to read books on prayer, autobiographies, spiritual growth but not so much directed toward (romantic) relationships.

Whose marriage inspires you?

Meg: My brother and his wife. It’s an incredible, awesome, beautiful marriage founded on Jesus.

Heartbreaker: I’ve been so blessed with so many amazing examples before me. There are several godly, Christ-honoring couples at church, at work, and in my family.

Tulah: Thanks to my job, I have a handful of marriages around me that I’ve seen that is quite remarkable (not perfect- but good). Disagreements- yes but respect and love is foremost.

What do you think is the most common misconception about your goal?

Heartbreaker:  That we just want to get married to be married. It’s so much more than just a ring on the finger. It’s a pursuit of God’s heart and His love reflected in our relationships.

Meg: That this is serious. For me, it’s not. As I said, it’s just a way to bring to light the otherwise hidden desire within me to be married.

Tulah: That the point is to get married just to be married. After seeing some amazing marriages- it seems that one of the biggest reasons is that a spouse can bring you closer to Christ and help you be more Jesus-like. Who wouldn’t want that and who wouldn’t want to go through that process with dear friends?

What are your thoughts about their quest?  Has anything changed? Tomorrow will be round 2 of questions!

3 Responses to “When It Comes To Love {Part Two}”
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  1. […] of the girls to get to the bottom of her true intentions. She wrote about it in two parts here and here. There’s a really good discussion going on. You should jump […]

  2. […] Click here to check it out >> When It Comes To Love {Part Two} […]

  3. […] When It Comes To Love {Part Two} […]

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